Bad mood

No
no enthusiasm
no ideas
no action
no wish
to do
anything.

No memory

Tonight
I have no memory
I can not make
a difference
what did I say
what did I think
what did I do
Confusion
What is reality
and
what is
just
in my mind.

Disturbing
Very disturbing

I forget
my thoughts
and actions
in 5 or 10 minutes

Lucky
I still managed to make
some food
and even
have visitors

But this
made it
even more
annoying
for me.

What was reality
or what was
just in my mind.

Or
I know that
there was something
in my mind
or maybe
even said out loud
but what was it
I can not recall.

Strange feeling.
Annoying feeling.

I blame coffee
and tomorrow
I will drink no sip of it!!!

24h does not go

Recently
I cannot feel
the balance and connection
in 24h rhythm.

Some days I need to
sleep much more
and others 4h is enough

as well
with eating
I can not take this
breakfast-lunch-dinner!
I need to eat the whole day
Or the whole first half of the day
And then
I can be without
for a day
or so.

And working
some days
I can accomplish
a lot of writing
others
I can not even
open the file.

I cannot take this rhythm
Or just
I need some other.
Still to be
figured out
if there is
any periodical system
in my basic needs...